May
11th:
Turtles 3 (2) - Miramar 3 (1)
by a special guest writer (?!)
"Come on, Stevie - pull your finger out!!"
It's not a bad life. I never have to work, indeed seldom have to move at all. When the sun is out, and there are children playing in the playground, I can't think of a better existence. Maybe there are times that aren't great, but you can't have everything; where would you put it? The other evening a guy wandered over and started up a conversation - "here, you, pal, what are you doing here? You're just, you know, all away out here, and it's just sad, you know? Me, I've got loads of mates, you know, but I'll tell ya this for free - their all bastards, ya here me, complete bastards!!!! Wouldn't know a mate if he kicked them in the balls. But you, you're genuine, you know that? A true mate, in fact, you're me best mate. Ever. You and me, mate, you and me against the world!!! Yeah. OK."
Then he staggered away, and pissed on a bush. And he set me wondering, you know, about my place in the world. Am I important? Do people care? Well the other two certainly care about me, or least appreciate me. We're a team, and each would fail without the others. Sure we spend half the year separated, but for the other 6 months we stand proud and resolute. And what a place to stand - with a perfect view of the playground. I love kids, and could spend hours watching their innocent enjoyment. Sometimes they come over to dance around me, and it's all I can do to keep still as the giggles run up and down my spine.
The only time more fun is when the Turtles come out to play soccer behind me. Yes, there are lots of others teams that use the space between us and the other lot way up the back, but I'm really fond of the Turtles. Maybe it's because they are the ones who have been here the most since I was first stuck in my hole 11 years ago (replacing some useless wooden monstrosity), and I know them all so well. Or maybe it's the way Snouter talks to me during a game, giving a running commentary on the mistakes being made further away.
Needless to say my spirits lift when I see their familiar frames trotting over for a warm-up. Some come over and give me a friendly kick, and others pat me affectionately.
On this particular day, I recognised some of the opposition as being from the old Miramar team, regular rivals from way back. This game would be, like always, an enthralling battle. My beloved Turts warmed up at my end, but switched around for the kick-off, and I had a non-communicative and, frankly, rude keeper to keep me company for the first half – he didn't even say hello!
From what I could see, the Miramar lads started well. Fully committed, with lots of angled running up front, I could see a busy day for Tel, Si and the lads. And the first goal was not long coming. One of their little forwards made a mess of Stevie on the right wing, and put a square ball across the top of the box. Charging through for them was a grey old chap who, allegedly, hadn't scored for 25 years prior to getting one last week. His right foot strike was clinical though, and gave Snouter no chance.
Tel restarts play with a goal kick after a regular Miramar raid on goal
That looked a bit daunting, but over the next few minutes the lads started to get forward a bit. It was a welcome sight seeing Weasel zipping around on the left. So far this season I had only seen him taking pictures, and wondered if he had retired, but he seemed to be back to his best. With Gordie's control, the attacks were starting to look good. Soon enough a corner was won. It was half cleared, but Wal went in with a fully committed header to win the ball for himself, then let fly with a shot from just inside the box. It was well directed into the far bottom corner but a bit dribbly, although still good enough to beat the keeper, who looks dodgy on the ground.
Around this time the Miramar team brought on an extremely tall chap, nearly as tall as me, and quite solid with it. This posed great difficulty to Tel and Si, who are seldom bettered in the air. Speaking of Tel, he looks very tanned. Obviously I don't know what any of these guys do with their time when not at Ben Burn, but by the looks of him Tel is either a builder or is gay.
The Turts went ahead when Telboy dragged his exquisite little tushy up for a corner. From Chris's delivery, Tel challenged effectively, and it went on towards my side. Daryl went in with a very brave header, and although not a solid connection, it had enough on it to beat the guy who was standing on the line beside me.
Hurray! Great progress into the wind. Now Miramar started to argue among themselves, always a good sign. It must be said that they are a pretty stroppy bunch, and their whingeing is rather tiresome. I heard one say to the other that they hoped this match report would treat them kindly - well, that kind of talk is always going to backfire.
When Daryl went off with a hammy, our attacks missed his speed badly, and it put more pressure on our mid-field. Chris was doing a lot of tracking, quite often going back from midfield to be the last defender. He's a real treasure, that lad.
Away in the distance I could see Snout making several good aerial takes under pressure, bless him. The last action of the half was to see Lance set free on a rampage towards our goal, but rather than square it to the unmarked Gordie he bloused a big shot well over me and wide.
The lads look for a bit of half-time inspiration
I like half-time. It gives me a chance to relax a bit, and look at the cars.
Snout came over, said "Hi", fingered my net, and we got underway again.
The first ten was intense, as Miramar gave it everything. Plenty of corners, and Snout pulled off several good saves. Then the Turts got a third goal.
Tel was up for a PK throw down the right, and nodded it on into the danger area. Shaun (a colleague of Dodger's, who looks more than useful) then took over, and put in two strong aerial challenges. He looked to have earned himself a shooting opportunity, but the ball had now entered Gordie's domain, and the trying Scotsman lashed it in to the far top corner.
Surely now it was in the bag, but Miramar weren't done. They lost all shape, and basically played the rest of the game with no midfield as they pushed more and more forward, but the Turts didn't handle that well, with lots of hasty balls forward
by-passing the big gaps in the middle. The Turtles did have plenty of chances to finish the game off, but with Gordie now off for a break, these chances fell to Boy, Chris and Lance. Enough said.
Steve Langridge, recently released by Botswana Rangers on a free transfer, entered the game at the hour mark to replace the once reliable Weasel. With 15 to go, he halted a dangerous oppo attack with a sliced clearance that was heading away towards our goal-line. Simon trotted off to save the corner, but Snouter announced loudly that it was to be left alone, for reasons unknown. From this corner, a fine header was directed towards my side of the goal, and Steve could only help it up into the roof of the net.
Then, a few minutes later, Miramar had a throw in on their right well upfield, and they aimed for their tall man. He nodded on, and a little guy behind him, although marked by Shaun, had a clear header, which he put goalwards. It was heading just inside me (the near post), and my first reaction was that Snouter would be there for that one, but he was somewhere else at the time, and it was all square
.
Wally Weta does a swan dive to celebrate the Turtles third goal!
Miramar finished the stronger, and Snout had another save to make, diving low to his right, just before the end. As the lads took my net down they talked about it feeling like a let-down, but that it was a good result nevertheless, against a team that was capable of beating anyone in the grade.
I don't mind it when everyone leaves after a game, and I'm left to my thoughts. Its a peaceful time, as the sun sets, and the odd dog rushes around. I wouldn't trade my site for anything. Except perhaps being one of the ladies asymmetric bars at the Olympics.